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After Mr. and mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.

Un fortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and out.

Equally fortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women-she loved to browse.

 

One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her local Wal-Mart.

 

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

 

Over the past six months, Your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store.

We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store.

Our complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below and are do!@#$%^&*ented by our video surveillance cameras.

 

On jun 15 He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

 

On July 2 Mr. Fenton set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

 

On July 7 Mr. Fenton made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

 

On July 19 Mr. Fenton walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice,

"Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away."

 

On August 4 Mr. Fenton went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

 

On September 14 Mr. Fenton moved a "CAUTION -WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

 

On September 15 Mr. Fenton set up a tent in the camping departent and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would

bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

 

On September 23 When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just

leave me alone?"

 

On October 4 Mr. Fenton looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

 

On November 10 While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

 

On December 3 Mr. Fenton darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

 

On December 18 Mr. Fenton hid in a clothing rack and when people browed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

 

On December 21 When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he !@#$%^&*umed a fetal position and screamed

"OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!" And last, but not least...

 

On December 23 He went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet

paper in here!"

 

 

 

Regards

Walmart

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